We Wait Now

Do you ever hate waiting for a result? It could be anything, from taking a test, to knowing why your engine sounds like a cat is stuck inside, and is screaming for help.

Well, today, I took my entrance exam for the nursing school. I don't know if I did good enough to get in, but they are supposed to call me to let me know whether or not I made it. It's now under an hour until they tell me.

I hate waiting. When you want to know something important, or looking forward to something, it seems like time slows down. And that's the only thing that is running through your mind.

Sleep is elusive. I tried taking a nap, to get my mind off of the results, and I couldn't sleep. I tried reading, but my mind wandered from the story line to the what if questions.

I swear, I'm going to grow old before knowing the results. If I do make it, then my sister-in-law and I are going out for a few drinks to celebrate. And if I don't make it, my sister-in-law and I are going out to drown my misery away. So at least that is a win-win situation. I'll be getting drunk either way.

Social Networks

All I can say is wow. It seems like where one social network pops up, two more pops up in a short time too. I know I have made mention of the most popular social network that there is in  a couple of previous blog postings.

I remember I was wondering when Facebook will be outdone by someone else. I think it's happening. Google revealed their new social networking site, Google Plus. I dare say, it's actually a little bit better.

I am getting off topic. You heard me though, the monster site known as Google is dipping their hands into social networking now. What next? What are they going to think of next?

Anyways, I am giving Google Plus a chance. If it's not as good as Facebook, which it's looking like it will be, then I am going to delete my profile and keep with Facebook.

But is this the beginning of the end for Facebook? Unless Mark Zukerburg can keep up with Google Plus, my vote is that it is.

The site is under a trial version, so that they can gauge where they can make things better and what not. I wonder how it's going to be when it becomes fully operational. I hope that it doesn't have those games on it. They become annoying after awhile. Especially when you haven't gotten on Facebook for a couple of days, and all anyone sends you is invites to their game.

No, I do not care if you "found" a poor helpless animal on your farm/city/diner. If it was a real animal, yes I do. But you are cluttering my Facebook with useless crap. So please stop. And in this, I hope Google is wise about not doing it. That's how Facebook can stay operational. By having their shitty games that it seems like the whole world loves.

I admit, I have a Farmville. But that was when I was in Cali, with nothing to do. Now, I am busy. I have an entrance exam for the nursing school this week, and if I pass it, I will be going to school in the fall. My husband is getting a job with HP this week, and that will make him busy too. We have a child we take care of, plus one puppy and one dog. With that and family that I don't mind seeing living close by, see what I mean?

Anways, I will sit back and watch the fight between these two networks takes place. The winner takes the crown, the looser, well nothing.

My Little Lady

I know I haven't updated this in awhile. But, here I am now. So sit down, grab a cup of joe, and have fun reading this!

A couple of weeks ago, my husband surprised me. He got me a boxer! I think he felt bad that I had to give up my dog when we moved here. The reason, because she is a special needs dog, and I couldn't care for her anymore. That and I couldn't take her with me to Oklahoma.

Anyways, how it all came about is simple. My mother in law and I took my niece's to their cousin's house for the night. She showed us the boxer puppy she still had left.

The puppy took to me instantly. She climbed in my lap, and stayed there for awhile. Every time someone called out to her, she would go running up, lick them in the face, and come running back to me. It's like she was saying this is my person.

I told my mother in law I wanted her so much. She is beautiful, and goofy. Not to mention the cousin's boxers were good with the three year old sitting there. That told me that the puppy will be good around Donnie.

When we came home, I tried telling Mike that I wanted her. He just nodded, and ignored me. I thought he didn't want me to get it. So I kind of got a little sad. For about two months he has been telling me no about getting another dog. I thought he would say the same thing.

I gave up pushing him about the puppy. When we were at the job fair, I knew it was the best time to ask afterward. He was in a good mood, and I knew he would at least listen to what I said.

He didn't say anything when I described her. He just climbed into our car, and talked about his former bosses before joining the Navy. When we got home, we lit a cigarette and half way through we smoked in silence.

Then my husband turned to me, and he just looked at me for a moment. What he said next made me astonshed. He told me that this dog will be mine, so I can choose what dog I wanted, but I better be really attached to her because he wasn't getting me another dog. I think he was done replacing dogs for me. Anyways, he told me that he will withhold the final decision after he saw her.

A couple of nights later, all of us went to Tammy's house again. With Donnie too. Tammy let the puppy back in the house. (She knew what was going on.) When he saw how attached she was to me, he gave the money to Tammy.

So now I have a boxer puppy! The only stigma is that we have to wait until we move to Tulsa to be able to bring her home. Gary doesn't want another dog here. He's been good about our pit staying in the house, and we don't want to push it.

But Friday we move to the house, and Saturday my mother in law and I are going to pick Lady up. I can't wait! It seems like things are looking up again.

Not just the dog, but Mike starts work in July, and I take the entrance exam for the nursing school on the 19th of July. If I get in, in one year I will be an LPN, and after that, I will go to school again to be an RN.

So for everyone who thinks that they can't make it in the civilian world, you don't know what you are saying. All you have to do is just try, and not be scared. If you let your fear over come you, you can't succeed.

Sewing Maniac

He's a maniac, maniac, do do do do!

Lol, I think I spelled that wrong. But anyways, I am a little maniac over quilting right now. My mother in law took me to hobby lobby, where we got a whole bunch of fabric for a quilt I want to make me and my husband. It is going to be a beautiful quilt.

The only question is, why doesn't people just make their own quilts, instead of paying a fortune in buying them? It took less than a hundred dollars to buy the fabric. Which means what I am making is actually costs less than spending sometimes over a thousand dollars for hand made quilts. I think that people need to learn and know the basics of sewing.

Anways, I was getting side tracked a little. But you know what? Who cares? It's not your blog, so there. I got all the little pieces cut out for my quilt, so last night I started sewing on the sewing machine. When my mother was alive, she taught me how to quilt by hand.

So this is a little different. I sewed once on a sewing machine, and it was a quilt I made for an ex of mine. So thinking back on it, I really don't give two shits if it came out shitty or not.

I was nervous starting up the machine. I mean, I had my mother in law guiding me through all the steps, but I couldn't help but feel the sweat start trickling down my back. It actually might have been from the heat. The sewing room gets hardly any air from the air conditioner.

After a couple of tries, I actually started to get the hang of it. I was up until three in the morning, sewing on my quilt. I kind of want to go back to it, but my mother in law is gone to an appointment, and I don't want to mess up royally without her help. Maybe one day I will feel comfortable enough to do it on my own, but not today!

Oh and I'll post a final blog when it's all done and finished with a picture of the finished product for you, the readers, to look at!

Thank You

I wish that I could explain to you what I feel right now. I wish I can tell you how alone I feel right now. But what's the point? I just learned how truly alone people can get. How truly alone I am. Sorry if I am not all perfect. Sorry if I loose my temper. Sorry if I don't win the best wife award. But how dare you talk shit about me? Do you know even what I went through? What our fights have been? No? Then butt out. I won't even apologize to you if you are reading this.

Do I get in your business? Do I sit there and talk shit about you? You tell me things too, but I don't ever pass judgement on you. I guess I learned how truly alone I really am. I guess Mike is right, you all just kissed my ass to get me here, and now that you have what you want, fuck me right? You don't know where I am coming from.

We're married. Guess what married couples do? FIGHT. Specially when there's stressful stuff happening, like say, moving almost across country. We are getting over it, and used to it, why do you got to act like I'm a bitch? Why don't you just open your eyes and look? And is it any of your business anyways? No? Then but the fuck out. You don't like me, fine, but don't get into my personal business and pass judgement.

There were things said between the both of us over the year that was hurtful. But we are working on it. It would be different if we weren't. But again, it's none of your business what was said, and when.

I just want to say thank you for making me feel so alone in a different state. I guess you are just like my family, I just bought your shit hook line and sinker. Fuck you.

Passing Attractions, Step Right Up!

I have noticed that we humans, as a whole, cannot have our attention on one thing for very long. If you think about it, look how many times we change our clothes style. I mean what was "fad" in the 70's isn't really in style anymore. Or Facebook.

Before Facebook, there was Myspace. In a way, Facebook ripped off Myspace. After FB got well known, Myspace kind of went down the shitter. And it didn't start there. I remember a site called Bolt. I don't know if you guys remembered, or was ever on it, but back then, it was the shit.

I don't remember if it had a little profile thingy or not, but what it did have was posting to the home page. It was exactly like how Facebook is. I remember going to the library (That's right, when I was living with Grandma I didn't have internet.) and spending my one hour allotment on the computer on that site.

Then came along Myspace. My sister actually got me into it because she found a girl who we went to highschool at Immanuel's profile. I thought it was pretty insane to post pictures of yourself on the site, and leave behind comments and what not.

So insued the Myspace craze. I learned how to write code for the background I wanted, and I wrote blogs on the site, and it was crazy. And now I don't really get on it.

Why? Because of Facebook. I was stationed in Japan, when one of my friend's in Virginia asked me when I was going to get a Facebook. I was kind of trying to keep it old school with myspace, because I didn't want to conform to yet again, another internet site.

In the end though, I relented. The site is pretty cool. Kind of basic, but whatever. It keeps your attention. And then for fear of their site being shut down, they added flash games to the site to hold their audience's attention. Why? Because of a new site called Twitter. So I won't be at all surprised that Facebook will take that walk of shame that Myspace and Bolt already walked.

My point to all this is, mankind gets bored too easy. If you think about it though, it's what helped us where we are at now. Some guy got tired of hitching his horse up to the wagon every time he wanted to go down the street, and invented the car. Another guy got tired of driving for insane long times to go see Aunt Betty in another state away, and invented the airplane.

See? But when it comes to internet sites, that's where we, as a spieces, get dumber. What has Facebook ever accomplish? And any site like that. Not saying that Facebook is some stupid site that won't help us invent the next greatest invention. Just that it's a "fad" thing now. Most likely our children in the future won't even remember/never been on it before.

Anyways, going off subject now, Vampires really do suck. I mean the stories are all rip offs of each other. I mean Count Dracula, he is the most bad ass vampire out there.

He had a harem, didn't give a shit, but was so gentlemanly. Then what happened to that? Ann Rice and Hollywood. They start protraying the vampires as lost souls who can never die. What's worse, is two things. One, they're VAMPIRES. Come on, do you really think that Dracula cared about what he did, what's he doing, and what's he going to do? Hell no. He didn't let that bother him.

But remember the movies/T.V. Interview with the Vampire, and Forever Knight? Just assuming that you HAVE heard of them, the main characters were going through eternity, redeeming themselves. I mean COME ON! Really? If I was Dracula, I would slap the shit out of them both!

And that brings me to my point two on why Vampires suck. It's a big rip off. I know I said that before, but I'll explain what I mean. Okay, so you have Interview with the vampire. It was a major hit, so you know what Hollywood did then? They made Forever Knight. Actually to correct myself, I think Forever Knight came out before Interview did. Anyways, one of them became an instant hit, so they made another cop of the same thing.

Then after that, here came Blade. Now I can't really knock on Blade, well because like Dracula, he was a badass. The only thing that is remotely similar, is the fact that he had feelings. I guess that's the half human part. Anyways, then they dressed up the vampires to suit the teenage girls and the fourty year old virgins and now we have Twilight.

Same gist, the vampire is trying to redeem himself by being good, whining about when he was bad, and seeking self redemption. Except one thing. They FUCKING sparkle. After that became a big hit, hollywood did it again.

The Vampire Diaries. Same thing. Self redemption and yadda yadda yadda. Except they don't sparkle, and you can kill them. Also, not half as annoying. See what I mean though? The same thing, just dressed up in different clothes, with a different name.

If you don't like that, Hollywood just gives the vampire silver hair, a bow, fake ears. What do you get when you add that up? Orlando Bloom...

Wow if you are still reading this, I commend you. This blog is really long.... Applaud yourself.

Two Weeks Left

We got two weeks left until we have to move out of the apartment. Then after that, we have another couple of days left in California. My husband is flying out to Oklahoma, and I am driving out with my sister in law. There's a part of me that is excited about going. It's just going to me, my sister in law, and the open road. She hasn't been this far west, and she's excited about going too.

Another part of me is depressed that my son and husband is leaving me for three days. This will be the first time that I will be away from my baby for that long. I hope that he won't get too anxious about me going. I know that I am. Maybe I can cover the anxiety for the both of us.

The good thing is, is that my husband will have three days all to him and our son. My husband is hoping that they can become closer during those days. He never really spent a long time alone with our son, and it shows. It took awhile for my son to even be happy about his daddy playing with him. I think because he's always working, and our son isn't used Daddy being around all that much.

Thinking about it though, I can't believe that a year has already came and went. I remember barely moving from San Diego to here, and thinking not this crap hole again. You see, I'm allowed to say it because I come from around here. I never had any intention of coming back again. Except maybe to visit family and that's it.

I am excited about finally starting our lives outside the military. We have been discussing, and making plans about this. Finally, I do not have to worry about my husband when he's at work. It's dangerous work that he does, and I can't help but worry.

Then again, my husband is always calling me a worry wart. That's my specialty I guess. To worry about anything and everything. I can't help it. Too much crap happened in my life to not worry.

I hope that my in laws aren't getting mad or tired of me calling all the time. I have nothing to do, and almost no one to talk too when my husband is gone. So what do I do? I call them. I know my mother in law is thrilled that I call her all the time. She's becoming like a mom to me, I guess.

Mike and I are finally finding each other again. There for a little while everything was kind of rocky. We were fighting more often than not. It was really bad. But now, we are trying to argue, and spend more time with each other. I mean, we are always around each other. It's different though. Being around someone, and spending time with the same person isn't the same.

My aunt told me that the first year of marriage is always the hardest. You never really know how the other person acts behind closed doors, until you start to live with them. And after the first year, things will get better. And they have.